Sunday, September 16, 2007
fuck my life. 5:23 PM
why do i hav such a girlfriend..
ytd was so sucky..
yea.. go movie with friends..
then say thought of askin me to go..
did u call??
if u really want me to go..
u said u dn wanna see me hurt anymore..
but wat u just did..
how hurtful.
thought u were shoppin with mom so cnt reply..
when yr movie ended, u dn even tell me..
but u were down there happy with friends..
dn even reply my msg..
yea.. yr friends were so important..
when u finally reply, u ask me go slp..
i waited for yr msg..
not ask me go slp..
when will u start understanding me..
u nvr did..ytd night i cried once again..
so much like a cry baby..
so long.. so hard..
even harder than the other day..
i was really crazy tt time.. perhaps im goin crazy..
i threw my handphone, hse phone hard on the floor..
i grabbed my spinning head..
so much for tt headache..
there was so much things goin through my mind..
those memories were killing me..
i felt so pain in my heart..
i was crazy..
for a moment tt time, i thought of just rushin out of the damn house..
and jump down..
i was in so much pain..
this damn life..
this damn world..
it was so lonely in my room..
the thing you said in sms was
"sry.. i dunno what to say.. urgh.. nvm bye.. slp early cos yr mom is coming back.."
there arent anyone for me.. yet i cried so fucking hard..
so much..
dn tell me go slp.. i want sth else..i want u to be there.. but well..
sigh..
thought playing "xiao yu xie li ke bai II" can make me a little btr..
but it made me worse..
i cried even harder..
recalling those memories.. made me so pain..
almost an hour..
even when my mom come back home..
i didnt know what time i fell aslp..
crying myself to slp.. sigh..
i woke up..
thought i was btr.. but the tears still coming down..
no one cares abt me.. not u.. not even my mom..
tts so hard..
my mom only keep throwing questions like
"are u goin to pay for a new phone"
"u think u great now ar? not hapy dn throw my hse phone la. u throw yr own handphone i wont scold u. why dn throw yr comp? then i dn nid to pay monthly"
she only cares abt money..
she asked tt girl to eat..
even take food for her..
but none to me..
she asked.. but "u btr come eat now. dn make me whack u"
how nice..
how.. nice..
no one cares..
im damn lonely..
but well.. no one cares like i said..
i dn wanna think abt anyth now..
heck care abt studying..
cos nth go inside anyway..
thinking abt the past only make me cry again..
"why.. why do i still.. love her.. "
but i love her..she dn even cares abt me now.. i just want u to understand me.."waiwai is crying.. "
"waiwai heart.. is broken "
"but sheena, my love, has nvr understand waiwai"
i didnt sent this.. cos i hav no more strength to type..
im goin crazy alrdy..
i just ate roasted rabbit
